Big Changes are a'comin

Okay. It's time for a big change. I keep repeating to myself that change is good. But is it considered change when it used to be that way for 18 years and after 5 years you have decided to change it back? Maybe it's more like going back to normal. I just couldn't take it anymore. Something needs to be done about it. I really thought about this change. It's a big jump for a girl. I thought I didn't want them. I put my foot down for five years, not I'm returning to the scene. I don't know if I'm ready for this jump. After I decide on this change, there's no going back. If I decide to go back to the way it was, then it will take a while to get back there. Are you confused?










I have decided to get bangs.








I had bangs for 18 years. No lie! I had the straight across the forehead (or in my case a fivehead) bangs for 18 years. I didn't grow them out until college. When no one else had them, I did. What made me keep them so long, I don't know. I am going to the hairdresser today. There's no turning back once I get them. Wish me luck!

I believe that I am a positive person. I believe that I try to find the good in everything. If that is the case, why do I find myself surrounded by very cynical people. I find that it's odd. My husband is cynical. He isn't all the time, but I have a hard time telling him certain things because of the comments that he makes. My best friend is also cynical. Am I a magnet for cynicism?? I love my husband and best friend dearly. I don't know what I would do without either of them, but jeez!

Maybe the reason I keep them around is because I enjoy having an opinion on the complete opposite side of the continuum. Maybe it helps me to see the full spectrum. The bad thing about me is that I am easily swayed towards one way or the other. There are a few things in life that you can't change my mind on:
1. Corn
2. Feet
3. My job

That's pretty much it. You would think that I wouldn't be easily convinced on the more important topics like homosexuality, abortion, or politics. Nope! If someone has a very compelling argument I will have the hardest time with holding my own. I had a hard time planning my wedding and making decisions because I would listen to my best friend who had different ideas for my wedding. I basically had to shut her out of my head. I would think I want hot pink EVERYTHING!! Then I would hear a rather boisterous voice (but oh so sweet) saying um...why not have everything neon green. Obviously that did not happen, but I have a hard time remembering that my opinion is my opinion and her opinion is her opinion and I don't have to change mine to fit hers. The weird thing is that I am a leader. What leader does that? I think that I am going crazy.

*There really is no reason for me to write this particular blog. I'm actually supposed to be working, but this is what I am doing to avoid it.*

But it also says...

	Dana	54 up, 86 down
	Sounds like man a. A Dana is a woman who is so obsessed with gaining attention from others that she will do anything, even ruin her appearance. Dana works out so much that she looks like a man, or a tranny. A Dana is addicted to plastic surgery. She will do anything to alter her appearance in way that she thinks will get male attention. She is typically a woman having a mid life crisis. A Dana is usually married but very unfaithful. Be careful of that Dana over there, she's probably got a husband and kids at home. No, that's not a tranny! It's a Dana.

According to Urban Dictionary

Dana

249 up, 86 down

Dana (Day-Na) is the word that defines as a completely powerful person who is not consumed by power and still has empathy. Danas are extremely competent in all aspects, intellegent, respectful, and well-mannered. Not only are they also very beautiful creatures, they have a good sense of humor. Dana does NOT come from Danae or Diana or Diane, in fact. Dana is a word all on itself, created to define awesome people. Person A has found the cure for cancer. Person B : "Wow, Person A! You are SUCH a Dana!"

Green Water Bottle

Is it normal to fall in love with a water bottle? I don't think it is, but I am.

About 3 months ago, I felt as if it was my turn to go semi-green and help the environment. I realized that Andrew and I were buying a lot of bottled water. I then bought a water filter for our sink and a plastic red bottle to drink my water. I thought to myself that I will be making my carbon imprint a lot smaller with this water bottle. I used the said red bottle for a while, until I encountered a little problem. It leaked. Not really leaked but we had issues. The top of the bottle screwed on but the problem occurred because it had a wide opening to drink out of. Whenever I drank out of this bottle, water went all over me. I looked as if I had a problem and that I forgot to open my mouth when I drank from this bottle in public. If anyone reading this blog saw me after drinking from this water bottle, no that was not drool down my shirt.

After dealing with the red water bottle for about a month, I bought a green bottle. It is very chic. It is BPA free (whatever that means). It has reduce, reuse, and recycle on the side which makes me feel better. The best part of it though is how the top is. It has a sorta flip top that has a straw connected to it. All you would have to do is suck, you didn't have to tilt your head back to drink. I was so excited about my new purchase. Ttthhheenn.....

I lost it. It didn't even make the journey home with me. I thought that I may had bought it and then left it at Wal-mart. Don't you hate that? I would have just gone back to the cashier except that I bought it in Jackson with Steph. After about 2 months I gave up hope for the pretty green perfect water bottle. Actually, I didn't know if it was perfect or not. I didn't have the chance to find out.

Let's fastfoward 2 months. Steph, Emily, and I went to VA for Jenn's wedding. I rode in the front seat the entire time. One weekend later on a road trip to Emily's wedding, what is in the floor of Stephanie's front seat. DRUMROLL PLEASE!!!!!! My green water bottle. If I was insane, I would have cried. I knew that I had gotten out of Walmart with that bottle. I made sure that I got home with it this time.

I just got back from a long walk in the hot sun. Nothing is better than water after being in the hotness. What did I do? I cleaned out my green water bottle and filled it up. I didn't even get one splash of water on me. This green water bottle is just as perfect as I thought that it would be. For something that all you have to do is suck to drink, it doesn't suck!! It's perfect.


The Ode' to the Green Water Bottle is complete. :)

Don't people know that I am trying to save the world? I don't understand it. I call and call and call and call, then I write all these case notes documenting that I called and how many people show up? ONE. Just ONE caregiver and 2 kids. I truely appreciate that one person and the twins, but really. I could have saved a lot of time and effort with the calling and the documenting if I knew that only one person was going to show up. I wouldn't have had 60 sandwiches made for only one family.

Why can't people protect their children? Why can't people understand that once a precious child is born into the world it becomes a priority? Why do people make stupid decisions that have major consequences? There are no answers to my questions. I know that.

Happily Exhausted

I just got back from my Virginia roadtrip. I had the best time. Even when things weren't going so well, like the storm on the way up there and and tree branch hitting the car, it made it memorable.

Jennifer is so lucky. Her new in-laws are some of the most wonderful people I have ever met. They love Jenn like a daughter. I can't even count the number of times Mary, Elijah's mother, told us that they had been praying for Jenn for 30 years, but they just didn't know her name. She also said repeatedly how Jenn was an answer to their prayers. Their family really wanted to get to know all of us, not just Stephanie. At night they had a family devotion led by Jenn's father-in-law. They specifically prayed for Emily to find a job when she moves to Iowa. They were so caring and loving. Their sons were very gracious with giving up their beds to a bunch of crazy girls. This wedding was so special, even though Jenn and Elijah were already married. The love and support was so strong during every event.

I had the best time with the girls. It was more like a Young Women's retreat. I enjoyed all the laughter, the discussions, and the friendship. Whenever we introduced ourselves, I was so proud of where we all were in our lives. We all have cool jobs and are in amazing places in our lives. Who else could say that she was a Professional Blogger (Ashley Harris) or a reporter?

Jenn was a beautiful bride, the only thing that might have competed with Jenn's beauty was the Virginia hillside. It was beautiful. Stephanie fell in love with the countryside. I would be fine if she moved there, because then I have an excuse to visit her there.

VOCA

I love my VOCA children. It's going to be very hard to say good-bye to them. I have really high hopes for my children. I hope that the girls will be able to grow in confidence. A confident woman/girl will get far in life. I hope they have the strength to say "NO" to what they don't want to do. In Hardeman county, many children become pregnant at a young age, and most likely their moms became pregnant at a young age as well. If I ever walk around Bolivar and see one of my children preggers, I might flip my lid. Just sign me up for Western because I will have gone crazy. I want these children to be success and achieve their dreams. I want my little girl who wants to become a pediatrician to achieve that goal. Forget the bullies who make fun of her for being too black or ashy or being raped. Yeah, kids at her school make fun of her for being raped. I want her to stand tall and proud. I want my child who wants to be a fashion designer to be famous. I want to wear her clothes or have her purse and brag about how I "knew her when." Even my little boy who wants to be a spy, I want to say go for it. He might not become a spy, but maybe an investigator or a police officer. They have so much to offer the world, and I would hate for them to settle. Poor Andrew. I have informed him several times that if anything happens to any of my kids' parents, we would be adopting them. Can't you just seen Andrew and I with a 13 year old black kid and saying that's our child? He'll get used to it.

Roadtrippin'

I only have to work two days this week. Yay!!! I get to go roadtrippin' with my best friend. I'm sure that the roadtrip with consist of these things:
1. Over analyzing everything
2. Hanson http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wrWamyL4Azc
3. Taylor Swift
4. Rascall Flatts
5. More discussions about life
6. Great dance jams in the car
7. Some Sean Kingston and Natasha Bedingfield
8. Junk Food, actually we might starve ourselves for the wedding
9. Good girl time!!!

I'm so excited. I'm going to miss Andrew, but the good times to be had with the bff will be worth it.

When we come back from the trip, Andrew and I will have been married for 6 months. I can't believe it. It has gone by so fast, but we couldn't be happier. Oh yeah!! I got accepted into grad school. I'm so excited!!! I know that it will be a lot of work, but it will be worth it because I will have so many more opportunities. I think I would like to be a social worker for a school. You get summers off. How wonderful would that be? I can get the benefits of teachers without having to be a teacher. Hopefully 3 years of grad school will go by fast.

Hunger

This blog is a way for me to avoid going downstairs and getting a snack. I find that I get hungry around 10:30 to 11:30 everyday. The problem is I have breakfast every morning. I never skip breakfast. It's the most important meal of the day. Typically I have cereal. I try not to eat the super sugary stuff, but I have to have some sort of sugar. I can't eat just Bran Flakes everyday. That stuff just doesn't start the day off right. Currently I have been eating Cinnamon Life cereal. It has a lot of whole grains and fiber in it. I also love Oatmeal. I really enjoy it, but the negative part about oatmeal is that I will be hungry again by 10:00 or worse 9:30. It's bad. What's really bad is that I have a stocked kitchen in my workplace that is filled with snacks. Currently, Walmart donated health food bars-you know that South Beach Diet bars or the Atkins bars. Why they donated them to the Carl Perkins Center? I don't know. They come in handy though. I don't feel so bad eating a fiber bar that has 36% of my daily needed fiber (which is very important to me) instead of gummy bears or moon pies or poptarts or airheads. We have all of those products in the kitchen downstairs. Wait! We even have popcorn, chips, and plenty of Walmart brand coke products. I do the best I can. I try to avoid going downstairs when I am hungry because inevitably I will go into the kitchen which may or may not be the best decision. I have no will power when it comes to going into the kitchen at work. Now I am chewing Dubble Bubble bubble gum. Maybe this will curve my hunger until I go to lunch with Amanda and Jessica, the new intern.

Dyersburg High our Alma Mater...

I can just hear the school song playing already. Tomorrow, Andrew's little sister is graduating. Not only is Katie graduating, but my second youngest cousin Mollie is graduating as well. That makes me feel old. All of the kids I know that are graduating, I used to hold in my lap. I remember Katie running around with Leah Jean (her bff) at eight years old around the band field. Man, time has flown by. I remember in April, I had gone home and I was playing with Mollie's phone. It's a touch screen phone and I was seeing how easy it was to text on it. I clicked on the text screen and what popped up was a text from Mollie's boyfriend that started with...."Well, when we get married..." WHAT THE CRAP??!! Why was this little pipsqueak of a guy (Actually he's quite a good Christian guy who is a biology major at UTC) saying this kind of stuff to my cousin. Then I thought,"Wait. Andrew and I were 16 when we started dating." That really put a perspective on things. They are so little and young. Actually, I am only five years older than her. It's amazing how things change in such a short period of time. Who knows where you are going to be in 5 years? In five years, I want to have already had a baby or about to have a baby. That's going to be such a big change.

Dear old school where we have studied
We will all agree,
That we'll never forget the training
Given by thee.
Dyersburg High , our Alma Mater,
We'll remember thee;
And we pledge thee our devotion,
Our Fidelity.

Why I still remember that, I'll never know. Maybe it's because Mrs. Edwards my AP English teacher made us serenade the other classes until we learned it. Maybe high school wasn't so bad, if I could erase all the drama and just have the good times.

Feeling Good

Today I am feeling good. That's a big thing considering it's 9:16am. I normally don't feel this good at this time of the morning. It's not because I went to bed early. I was in bed by 8:30, but Man vs Wild was featuring Will Ferrell on his show, Andrew had to stay up and watch it. It's not because I felt awake this morning. Nope! It's not because I had a soothing morning. I had to fuss at my dog this morning because she tore the tag thingy off of Andrew's tie. I don't like fussing at my dog because she covers under a table and sometimes she shakes. I don't know why she shakes. I don't hit her or anything. I am wearing a cute summery shirt today. Maybe that's it. My landlord is also installing a new window air conditioner until today in my house. That also could be it. This is also my first night of working with the youth. I don't really know what to expect. I'm supposed to be working with this lady Dai (pronounced Day) with a drama group. I really don't know much about skits and stuff. I know sign language, there's a BIG difference. I know you can incorporate that into skits and dramas, but I enjoy doing straight sign language. I don't play with that interpreted crap. If I'm talking about the sun, I'm going to say sun not make a circle with my arms and put it over my head like a child's song. I have no idea what Dai's background is in this. I have about 12 years of sign language experience. I'm not going to start thinking negative thoughts about this before it even starts. Mr. Wayne just asked me if I could teach sign language and I said yes and then he switched into calling it drama. Hhhmmmmm. Okay. I hope that I can get kids interested in it.