Last day of school and Bacon

Bacon.
It's one of those things that pretty much everybody likes, like chocolate.
My mother insists in cooking with Turkey bacon. Yeah, it's healthier but it's just not the same. Kim just made bacon downstairs in the office. The smell is sweeping up the stairs saying,"Oink Oink. Doesn't that smell good.".....

*the bacon is just as good as it smells. Kim let me have a piece of her bacon.

Today is the last day of school for the children of Hardeman County. What was that like? I don't remember anymore. I remember the excitement. The last day of college was completely different from the last day from regular school. In college, everyone is ready to move out of their dorm. I hated cleaning up the dorm. Does anyone remember the spilt candle wax that was on the floor for half a year? Even when I start grad school, the last day of school still isn't going to be the same because I will be continuing working and my classes will continue in the summer. It's crazy.

If you had told me...

If you had told me when I was ten years old what I would be like when I was 23, I wouldn't believe you. I would simply say "No way" and go back to reading what every classic novel I was reading at the time. At ten years old, I had buck teeth, big glasses and no friends. I knew that I would never have a boyfriend, even though I dreamed of it daily. I knew that I would never have any good friends. It's amazing how God leads your life in a completely different direction then what was imagined. I think about my friends. Jessica Fuqua (hello Jessica!) would have only hoped to meet her future husband as soon as she did when college began. Sara Coleman, oops, Depew would never had imagined that she was going to meet the man of her dreams while he was chaperoning a youth trip. I would never had imagined that the guy that wore a camo jacket over everything, who wore chains and baggy pants, who scared the living daylights out of me would be my wonderful adoring husband. I bet God laughs at our plans. We probably make him sad because we don't have the faith that God is going to provide a way better than imaginable. That 10 year old girl got braces, contacts, and made very good friends. There are some friends that have moved on and we have drifted up, but I still love them dearly. I love my friend Erika. We found a kindred spirit in each other the day in 5th grade when we bounced around on bean bag chairs singing "Where in the world is Carmen San Diego?" She now is married and has an adorable son.

"For I know the plans for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.' " -Jeremiah 29:11

That verse keeps playing in my head. My best friend in the entire world is struggling with the fact that God is not giving her what she wants more than anything in the entire world. I have never had a friend like this friend. I grew up with friends that I was friends with for a very long time. We didn't hold each other accountable for anything and didn't love each other regardless. Then I found my best friend. This friend has always been an encouragement and willing to play the Devil's Advocate and give you her advice, even when it's not asked for. She takes it personal when people don't listen to her advice and everything goes sour. My best friend is reaching for her goals. She knew that she was going to be "Barbara Walters" (not really). But she knew that since she was very young. Look at what she's doing now! How she can feel that God isn't listening to her prayers. God knows what He is doing. It's not time for her to find her person. She is not meant for small things and living in small cities. She has big dreams that haven't been fulfilled yet!! Why in the world would you want to meet and find the man of your dreams in a town that you don't want to live in. God has something special meant for my friend. Something so special, that she wouldn't even be able to take it all in. God always provides!

It's Okay. It's just gas!

No!! It's not okay!! I felt as if I was dying last night. I'm not sure what time I fell asleep last night. I am sure that I drifted off mid-sentence. I was exhausted. I then woke up around midnight to a horrible horrriiibblle HORRIBLE pain under my left boob. What the heck?? I thought that I was just sore from working out earlier. I did work out, so that's a success! I tried to apply pressure to my sore area and I couldn't find a position comfortable enough. I even had a hard time breathing and was a little nauseous. I went to the bathroom and nothing happened. I tried a heating pad. All that did was cause me to be in pain and be hot. I don't think I fell back to sleep until 6:00am. 6:oo AM!!!! I wake up for work at 6:40!!!!!! I would have called in sick, even though I was feeling better but I promised a 5th grader that I would attend her graduation and I had to run my first RCP Advisory Board meeting and call all of my caregivers to remind them about support group tomorrow night. Who can take a day off? Not me! Kim informed me that it was probably trapped gas. She also offered a remedy of getting my finger wet and putting baking soda on my finger and licking it. She says that it's gross but it stops you from having to spend a lot of money on Trapped Gas fixer-uppers. Who knew?? I sure didn't at 5 AM!

It's Tuesday!!!!!

I love Tuesdays (sometimes). This particular Tuesday should be a good one. I had to be at the office by 8:00am this morning. That's what time I am supposed to be at the office. Typically I am in the office by 8:10 or even 8:30 if I'm planning on working late. There is no one waiting at the time clock. In fact, we don't even have a time clock. This particular morning though, Kim is at a 5th grade graduation. Apparently in Bolivar, 5th grade graduations are big things. I am going to one tomorrow in fact. The 5th grader is really nervous about her graduation ceremony. "What if I trip?" "What if I throw up?" "What if the girl who is going in front of me doesn't show up and I have to go first?" "What if I cry?" It's amazing to me how important this graduation is to her. In Bolivar, after the 5th grade you have to go to Bolivar Middle School. Which is a normal progression, except if you have never gone to a Bolivar School before because you live in Toone, Whiteville, or Hornsby. Not only are you leaving the school that you have attending since Kindergarten, but you are having to ride the bus for even longer than you used to. I understand the nervousness. Some of the children are acting as if they are graduating from high school or college. I just pretend with the children that their graduation is one of the most important things in the world. I wonder if they hear Vitamin C's Graduation song and get teary eyed? Anywho...back to my Tuesdays. I have VOCA today. We are winding down to the end. That means that right now we are reviewing all the information from the year and discussing our goals and how to achieve them. I have younger VOCA today. They are so sweet (most of the time) and they don't understand that they won't be coming to the center anymore. I hope that I have made a difference in the lives and that they remember my fondly. Maybe I'll be their "Morrie, " like in the book Tuesdays with Morrie (I highly recommend it). Tuesday nights only mean one thing in the Hampton household...aMERican Idol!!!!-I wrote it like that for Stephanie who can't stand Ryan Seacrest. This week is the finals. I don't know if I will be able to handle the stress. I almost couldn't handle it when it was Adam, Danny, and Kris. I don't like Adam. Yeah, he can sing on the right note. Big Whoop! He screams in falsetto. It bothers me to my core. He completely lost me when he sang Ring of Fire. I had to choose between Danny or Kris. That might have been one of the hardest decisions I have ever made. Do I choose the sweet widower who is Christian? or Do I choose the 23 year old who married his high school sweetheart and plays in a praise band? Who do you think I chose? I went with Kris. I related to him and he seems very modest. I spent 30 minutes constantly texting my votes for Kris. While I did make that decision and I was confident with my choice, I was still upset with Danny was sent home. I hope. Rather I Pray that all of the Danny's fans will vote for Kris and beat Adam. I don't care that Adam's gay, I just really don't like to be screamed at and I would never buy his CD. I don't know if I'm going to be able to handle the stress over the next two nights. But tonight is a special night. A tv show that was made for people like me. The dorks who love to sing and dance to show tunes. GLEE is premiering tonight. I hope that it's a good show because I am really really excited about it. I am not ashamed of my excitement because I know that there are others out there just like me who love singing Dancing Queen and the Sound of Music soundtrack. I can't wait!!!

It's Officially Official Now

I am no long Dana Elizabeth Archer according to Social Security records. I am officially Dana Archer Hampton. It was a bigger decision than I thought to change to Dana Archer Hampton or Dana Elizabeth Hampton. Andrew thought I should change it to DEH because everyone in his family has the middle name of Elizabeth. I wanted to keep the Archer though. We have no males in my family and so there are no more Archers. I am considering naming a child Archer. I wonder if it would have been too much to be Dana Elizabeth Archer-Hampton. I know that I haven't lost my identity, but I guess it took me so long to do it (5 months) because I wanted to hold on to that last piece of my childhood. "Today, I am now an adult"-Grey's Anatomy.

Andrew might be arrested. J/K...maybe. Andrew has this horrible memory. He can't tell you very much from his past or remember what you told him 2 days ago, but darn it he can remember numbers. We were sitting very patiently in the Social Security office for about 30 minutes even though they told me it would be a ten minute wait. Andrew got bored and started memorizing the people's numbers who were going to the front desk. He remembered their numbers perfectly. He kept talking ALOUD about how he was planning on going home and searching for their information to steal their credit card information. Um, yeah. Not too smart of an idea. He was completely joking, but the lady sitting in front of us didn't know that. Andrew hadn't even showered and probably looked like white trash to her. So, if my next blog is about bailing my ex-husband out of jail, that's why. That brings up another point. Would I divorce Andrew if he landed in jail? I guess it depends on what he landed in jail for. If it was for murder or rape or something horrendous, then of course I would. But if it was for something stupid, I think he would be okay. Could you imagine introducing him as,"Have you met my husband Andrew? The Convict?" Then I would have return to the Social Security office which is 36 minutes away and get my name changed back. That might be too much of a hassle though. It's something to consider.

How Dare She??!!!!!

There is this great lady that goes to my church. She is really funny and related to one of my favorite people in the world, our office manager Kim. She's not very old, but she has an older son. I'm sure that she has some great stories about her life. I really enjoy hearing what she has to say and I always have tried to sit by her during Discipleship Training.
Not, 15 minutes ago Kim asked me if I talked to this lady much. I told her that I hadn't talked that much to her but I told a funny story about her during graduation Sunday. Kim then shared with me that this particular woman had emailed her asking if I liked her because she thought that I didn't like her because I never talked to her or spoke to her when I saw her. What???!!!!! I think that this lady is great. I have not spoken to her when I saw her at school before, but in my defense I am really bad at recognizing people when I see them in places that I don't expect to see them. I see her at church, not at the elementary school in a suit. There were also about 10 mothers crammed into a small space and I had to check out my kids, not to get home early but because I had a job to do. I was very focused because I HATE checking my kids out at this elementary school because the office workers act put out to assist me in any way. So I'm sorry that I didn't recognize her. I was FOCUSED!!!! She did touch my arm and I was surprised to see her there and spoke briefly. It was loud and crowded and I always go stand by the door so that my children can see me. I wasn't being rude, I was just doing my job. And ANOTHER thing!! I love the women in my class at church. They are some of the sweetest and funniest women I have ever met. The problem is is that I'm still getting to know them and they are comparing funny stories about their children. I don't have children. What stories will I share? I just listen. I really like this woman. Now I feel as if I really have to go out of my way to make her know that I like her, but if I go too far then she will know that Kim told me. Now that I think about it, I did talk to her on Sunday morning. Why wouldn't I like her and why wouldn't she like me? I understand that sometimes people just don't like you. I get that, but normally there's a reason. Sometimes personalities just don't click and it's obvious. This lady and I do click, we just are at different parts in our life and I'm still learning my way around the church dynamics. I am not a rude person. I typically like everyone. I would never dislike someone unless they have done something to me or a friend. UUGGHHHH!!! I guess sending her flowers on Mother's Day is too much. I could always offer to take a test for her since she is trying to get her business degree. Maybe I should go to her son's graduation and invite myself to the graduation party afterwards. What do I need to do? Wash her feet??? I always smile at her and say hello. Next Sunday I will make sure that before we sing in choir that I will have a basin and a washcloth to scrub her feet down real good. Maybe I should skip the washcloth and use my hair. That's a plan...maybe.

HEY! I GOT THE SWINE FLU!!!

Just kidding. I really don't. I understand the seriousness of the disease, but I'm seriously sick of hearing about it. I wonder how many people have gone into doctor's offices with a cold claiming that they KNOW without a shadow of a doubt that they have the swine flu. My extremely hypochondriac friend doesn't even think she has the swine flu. Even she is annoyed by it. That's says a lot.

Here's whats coming up in May:
May 10th-Mother's day. Not sure what I'm doing for the madre. Need to talk to sister about that.

May 16th- Dan and Sara's Wedding. I'm so excited for them!!!

May 17th-Andrew and my singing debut. We have never sang together as a duet. Honestly it scares me. Most people would think that singing with your significant other would bring confidence, but not if your husband is a "Simon Cowell" type of guy. He wanted to do it, so I guess I can't sing too bad. We are singing "Faithful One" by Selah. It actually is a wonderful song and my cousins sang it at our wedding. Hopefully we (I) can do it justice.

Oh yeah. My yearbook teacher from high school passed away. Here is how my cousin told me.

Mollie: Did you hear about Ms. Criswell?
Dana: No. What happened?
Mollie. She had a heart attack this morning.
Dana: What?! How is she?
Mollie: She's not well.
Dana: What do you mean by not well?
Mollie: She died.
Dana: Silence

What a way to tell someone that an old teacher passed away.